{"id":1272,"date":"2007-06-08T07:37:35","date_gmt":"2007-06-08T12:37:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.tommangan.net\/twoheeldrive\/?p=1272"},"modified":"2007-12-03T13:09:46","modified_gmt":"2007-12-03T21:09:46","slug":"a-pct-dispatch-7","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.tommangan.net\/twoheeldrive\/index.php\/2007\/06\/08\/a-pct-dispatch-7\/","title":{"rendered":"A PCT dispatch"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.trailjournals.com\/entry.cfm?id=186224\">Katie Worth, from mile 367.<br \/>\n<\/a><\/p>\n<blockquote><p>Maybe I can find a way to blame McDonalds for the forest fire I<br \/>\nstarted today, too. Hmm, like maybe one of the 4,000 cows that<br \/>\ncontributed to my burger yesterday was fed a hormone that<br \/>\ninteracted with a random chemical in my brain to create the<br \/>\nneurotoxin Moronicus Humongous, which jumped right in<br \/>\nthe middle of two otherwise-functional neurons and decided to<br \/>\nlight my stove on a breezy, loamy hillside.<\/p>\n<p>There were a bunch of us sitting there above a spring after the<br \/>\nlong climb of the day, and I was craving something that was not<br \/>\nOreos, so I lit my alcohol stove, intending to make myself some<br \/>\ncouscous Phoebe had sent me in her package. We were all chatting<br \/>\naway, but the instant I lit the stove, Noodlehead Angelhair<br \/>\nlooked over and said, &#8220;That looks a little tippy.&#8221; I could only<br \/>\nagree with her, but once you light an alcohol stove, you can&#8217;t<br \/>\nreally extinguish it or move it, so I tried to gingerly place<br \/>\nthe pot on the stove, and when I let go the whole stove, flames<br \/>\nand all, went over and rolled down the hill. Angelhair leapt up<br \/>\nand started stomping the fire out, and I doused it with all this<br \/>\nspring water I&#8217;d just lugged a quarter mile up<br \/>\na steep hill.<\/p>\n<p>Thankfully, thankfully, thankfully, thankfully, it only lit a<br \/>\nfew needles on fire and they were extinguished and everything<br \/>\nwas fine. Everything, that is, but me, because my soul was dying<br \/>\nan anguished death of mortification, having stunned myself with<br \/>\na<br \/>\nwhole new level of stupidity. I swear, you could tie my head to<br \/>\na string and it would float on away, maybe accidentally bumping<br \/>\ninto the Hindenburg and lighting it on fire en route. I&#8217;m just<br \/>\nglad I already have a trail name because otherwise I&#8217;d get<br \/>\nSmokey&#8217;s Nemesis or something.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>The next several entries after this one are really great, by the way &#8230; Katie seems to be the Emerging Voice of the Trail this year.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Katie Worth, from mile 367. Maybe I can find a way to blame McDonalds for the forest fire I started today, too. Hmm, like maybe one of the 4,000 cows that contributed to my burger yesterday was fed a hormone&hellip;<\/p>\n<p class=\"more-link-p\"><a class=\"more-link\" href=\"https:\/\/www.tommangan.net\/twoheeldrive\/index.php\/2007\/06\/08\/a-pct-dispatch-7\/\">Read the whole thing<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0},"categories":[153,107],"tags":[150,512],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.tommangan.net\/twoheeldrive\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1272"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.tommangan.net\/twoheeldrive\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.tommangan.net\/twoheeldrive\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.tommangan.net\/twoheeldrive\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.tommangan.net\/twoheeldrive\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1272"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.tommangan.net\/twoheeldrive\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1272\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.tommangan.net\/twoheeldrive\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1272"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.tommangan.net\/twoheeldrive\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1272"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.tommangan.net\/twoheeldrive\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1272"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}