Rearing their ugly heads

From Calvin Beam:

  • far from” The game was far from over (why not
    “not”?).
  • a pair of” A pair of singles (usually “two”)
  • straight” instead of consecutive (think of the
    potential for confusion in “Joe Montana was the third straight
    San Francisco player to win the award.”)
  • reared” instead of raised (“Miss America
    Heather Whitestone was well-reared.”)
  • Avoid these like the plague

    Pat Churchill sends these along:

    An old news editor of mine (probably quoting a revered source) used
    to tell us “Cliches should be avoided like the plague.” The cliches that irritate me:

  • “Well positioned to take advantage of (an upturn in the economy)”
  • Captions reading “Blabla and blabla sharing a joke”
  • People who have obviously been sacked “resigning to pursue
    other interests.”Along with:
  • Take no prisoners
  • Given no quarter
  • Worst-case scenario
  • Mortifying experience
  • Gets the nod
  • Continue to monitor developments
  • Showered with good wishes
  • Brandishing a [sawn off shotgun]
  • Went the extra mile
  • Beyond his/her wildest dreams
  • A disaster waiting to happen
  • Nailing hammers

    From Laura Moyer (don’t tempt her to give up her day job to become a folk singer):

  • How about, “Legislators hammered out an eleventh-hour compromise.” Sounds like it should be in a folk song:
      If I had a hammer,
      I’d hammer out a compromise
      At the eleventh hour
      All over this laaa-and
  • Also, there are oodles of nice nouns for frozen precipitation. No
    need–ever–for “the white stuff.”
  • Safely ahead

    From Paul Murray, editor of The West Australian:

  • Safe haven. What other sort of haven could there be?
  • Ahead of. A dreadful television term rapidly replacing the lovely “before” in newspapers.
  • Facilitating a hike

    Lee Anthony sent the following:

    These two really piss me off:

  • Hike” as in “tax hike” or “price hike”: I really wish taxes and prices would take a hike, but they just keep increasing.
  • Facilitate“: A ridiculous bit of public servantspeak
    that’s increasingly finding its way into news reports.
  • A few for the guillotine

    Calvin Cahan unloaded these with an eloquence
    born of bile (editor’s note: “tumbrel” is the cart the French
    used to haul people off to the guillotine; I know because I had to look
    it up): I’m strongly opposed to capital punishment, but in the case of the
    following terms, I say, “Make haste! Load them on the tumbrel!”

  • “Give back to the community“: Give what back to
    the community? What did the “community” ever actually give
    that is subject to being returned? What, in fact, is the “community”?
    How broadly should it be defined? This is a desiccated cliche that
    signifies nothing, although it does serve to point out that one of
    the chief characteristics of contemporary life is that there is precious
    little sense of community.
  • Empowered; empowerment“: A term that has been so overused and applied so indiscriminately that its initial meaning
    has been diluted to the point of extinction. For example, a politician
    who promises to “empower” a particular group just about
    ensures that the group will remain powerless.
  • Closure“: If Diogenes were alive today, he no
    doubt would be searching for closure instead of for an honest man.
    This mind-numbing, reductionist piece of psychobabble trivializes
    the richly variegated range of human feelings and emotions. Oh, how
    I fervently desire to closure the door on this noxious example of
    lexical pestilence!
  • This one is a riot

    Bob Noble, a former UPI wire editor who wants broadcasters to stop
    referring to baubles and bangles as “JOOL-er-ee” instead of
    “JOO-wel-ree” and ban the insidious “Smith’s Paint Store
    is having THEIR (instead of its) semi-annual sale,” also wants
    to toss this out:

    In cases of rioting, it seems the stories invariably have the miscreants
    throwing “rocks and bottles.” Take a walk down any
    city street, and there may be an occasional bottle, but few rocks.
    “Debris” would have probably sufficed.

    Flackery gone mad

    Mitch Wagner can hack no more of the following from public relations flacks:

  • “(Whatever) just got easier.” as in: “Cleaning
    viruses off your hard disk just got easier…”
  • “Taking (whatever) to its next level” as in: “Taking virus-scanning to its next level…”
  • Raising the bar on (whatever).” After we raise
    the bar we dance the limbo, and then we do the hokey-pokey and we
    turn ourselves about. And that’s what it’s all about, hey.
  • The company executive quote that starts, “We are proud to be
    working with XYZ Corp., an acknowledged market leader.”
    That’s a double-cliche there, “we are proud” and “market
    leader.” The executive is sometimes “excited” rather
    than proud.