Zero day musings from PCT’er Cloudspotter, during a stop in Big Bear last week:

The Top 10 Ways To Tell If It’s Time To Do Laundry

10. When you take off your clothes, they retain your body shape.

9. The ground squirrels all pass out when you pass by.

8. The military contacts you about using your clothing as a biological weapon.

7. When you hitch a ride, the driver keeps his head outside the window.

6. You can smell dayhikers 1/4 of a mile away, but you can’t smell yourself.

5. Your socks must be forcibly removed from your feet with power tools.

4. Your clothing walks into town before you do.

3. Someone has to revive you with smelling salts after you dress.

2. You can’t remember your shirt’s original color.

1. You get to Canada.